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Rant - People expecting $$$$$$ Christmas gifts

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Tazznum1

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Ok, the last few years I have widdled Christmas presents down to a very select few. Now being married, I married into a whole new mindset. People on his side think that now because he is with me and they think we can afford more than we can on gifts for them or "loans." :lol: We are getting his oldest the Wii U. Got it already on Wednesday. His cousins and nieces and nephews aren't his kids. I'm completely fine with getting them $50ish christmas gifts, but other than that, I'm not. I try to be cool about things and financial matters but then when I go in rachet mode about things he thinks its funny as hell as I'm trying to explain why I think the way I do.
 
I feel you on that tazz. I personally don't feel we should give DH's family gifts since they don't give us any but DH feels that we should regardless...it is a sore spot w/me since they are such assholes...IMO, assholes don't deserve gifts!
 
Tazznum1 said:
Ok, the last few years I have widdled Christmas presents down to a very select few. Now being married, I married into a whole new mindset. People on his side think that now because he is with me and they think we can afford more than we can on gifts for them or "loans." :lol: We are getting his oldest the Wii U. Got it already on Wednesday. His cousins and nieces and nephews aren't his kids. I'm completely fine with getting them $50ish christmas gifts, but other than that, I'm not. I try to be cool about things and financial matters but then when I go in rachet mode about things he thinks its funny as hell as I'm trying to explain why I think the way I do.
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I know I'm absent most of the time, but weren't you just riding the bus flirting with a dude? ****, I'm confused...nevermind, I seem to live there lately.
 
Maybe get them all nominal gifts, in the $10-$20 range, to train them not to expect elaborate gifts. We have totally cut down on who we give to & the amount we give, and we still spend a small fortune.
 
dragonfly said:
Maybe get them all nominal gifts, in the $10-$20 range, to train them not to expect elaborate gifts. We have totally cut down on who we give to & the amount we give, and we still spend a small fortune.
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I agree train them because if not now, it will just become a worse presidence and very very difficult to have this discussion with dh when your fed up!
 
kewpon addict said:
I feel you on that tazz. I personally don't feel we should give DH's family gifts since they don't give us any but DH feels that we should regardless...it is a sore spot w/me since they are such assholes...IMO, assholes don't deserve gifts!
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Tagline nom :lol:
 
I love to give...I find myself running around seeing things to buy for others constantly, but this year we are only doing our parents outside of the kids and out god children. I have too many cousins and even my sister who have come to expect things for. Us and we are not at the place we used to be financially. Besides my mom no one even asked how we were doing during the 6 months DH was out of work. We were fine, but it would be nice to have s done ask. My aunt hasn't paid her phone bill on our line for almost 2 years...that's her Christmas
 
silviavm said:
I agree train them because if not now, it will just become a worse presidence and very very difficult to have this discussion with dh when your fed up!
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Plus, if it does get to the point where you have to have that conversation with your DH, and he is of a different mind than you, it could lead to resentment. Resentment is the death of marriage, imo, so it's really important to work together so you're both on the same page, so resentment doesn't form. DH & I both abide by the rule that compromise is key, and compromises that are fair usually involve both parties feeling like they lost a little.

Jeezus. You can tell I've spent the morning on the phone with therapists, case workers & the school. Beer, here! :surrender:
 
Btw, assholes don't deserve gifts but we give them cheap gifts anyway to try to change their hearts!

Here is how the card should read..

Aaahem, here's your cheap gift..don't be an ****!

:snicker:
 
kewpon addict said:
I feel you on that tazz. I personally don't feel we should give DH's family gifts since they don't give us any but DH feels that we should regardless...it is a sore spot w/me since they are such assholes...IMO, assholes don't deserve gifts!
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So true and thats exactly why my DH's family doesnt get anything anymore. . But then again, we don't talk to them anymore whatsoever. I used to get his family really nice and thoughtful gifts and I didnt really expect much in return from them but atleast a little gratitude. But when they expected us to get them a PS3, dvd player, sterosystem, and an ereader, than I started to get pissed, especially since the dvd player and stereo was a replacement of what I had already previously gotten them--the stereo got infested with ****roaches! :dunce:
 
kewpon addict said:
I feel you on that tazz. I personally don't feel we should give DH's family gifts since they don't give us any but DH feels that we should regardless...it is a sore spot w/me since they are such assholes...IMO, assholes don't deserve gifts!
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Maybe a tube of Preperation H and some Tucks to drive home the message?! :biggrin:
 
Hell to the no! Assholes with their hands out are greedy. Once you start they will not stop asking, the bank of Tazz will officially open and it will be very hard to close.
 
It is a long-time running joke in my family that I give lovely, tasteful, thoughtful, beautifully-wrapped gifts. But no gift receipts, because I didn't spend anything on them.

:lol:
 
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