One of my friends (I'll call her Suzy because you never know who is out there!!!) lives far away and we only see each other about once a year. We meet in the town where we grew up and sometimes we are both there and sometimes we aren't.
I hadn't heard from her in awhile and then another friend tells me that Suzy has been suffering from severe depression. The kind where you don't get out of bed, shower, brush your teeth or eat.
Since she lives so far away, I was at a loss as to what I could do. I don't have money to pay for a cleaning lady which I was told she really needed and getting her meals was something I couldn't figure out how to do.
Now she is better, but still not doing great. Besides keeping her in my prayers and sending mail (she doesn't get on her email or text) what can I do? I really would like to help with the food, but don't know how to coordinate it long distance.
I was also told that her husband was pretty worthless as far as helping out. He actually had a party while Suzy was out of it! So anything I do, I can't deal with him.
Any suggestions are appreciated. I was in such disbelief that this person I knew was suffering so much, I just had no idea what to do. Now that I'm used to it, I want to do something.
Can you get her on Seattle Sutton? I know how expensive it is but it's a way to get food to her or does she have a food delivery service in her area, i.e. Pea Pod?
Can you get her on Seattle Sutton? I know how expensive it is but it's a way to get food to her or does she have a food delivery service in her area, i.e. Pea Pod?
I didn't even check on that. The only problem I see with Seattle Sutton is that she has 2 kids and I understand that the portions for SS are kind of small. Peapod is something to check into. It's just so hard with her being far away.
I know when I'm going through my bad bouts of depression, I find it most helpful to receive phone calls and visitors. Is there any way you could take a weekend to go visit and take care of the kids and give her a break?
Are you comfortable enough talking to her about medication? Encourage her to seek help. If she's on medication, it may need to be tweaked. I know just about every year around February ... I have to start taking more and am able to decrease it in the spring.
Exactly what I was going to say.....if she's not on meds, she needs to be.
As far as helping out, can you find a pizza place or a restaurant that delivers in her area? I know you're probably thinking something more than just a meal but if you found a restaurant maybe you could order a few trays of something so that it will last longer.Either way I'm sure it would be greatly appreciated.
I've suffered with depression my whole life. Little things that have helped me help myself were/are someone coming over to check on me. Calling does nothing. I'll ignore you all day/everyday if I don't want to be bothered. Offering to take my kids for a day so I could be by myself or rolling up your sleeves and start cleaning my house. 9 times of 10 I hate to see company cleaning my house so I'll pitch in which as a result gets me going again. Letting me know its time to get back on the meds. For me I know when I need to go back on my meds, but I tend to put it off thinking I can fight through the episode so having someone else ring that bell for me will give me the push I need. Lastly, sometimes not even talking about the depression, but just to sit and have a laugh with someone when I'm feeling like **** puts things in perspective and really helps.
I hope your friend gets the help she needs and feels better soon. She is lucky to have a friend like you.
I was very depressed after I lost my mother to cancer in 2007. I was also a SAHM with a 2 1/2 yo and a 6 month old, my DH worked all the time, and I felt very lonely.
I don't know about others but I can tell you that I would have gladly welcomed some phone calls, emails, cards in the mail, etc just to know that someone was thinking of me. I did get some of those early on but then they stopped a couple weeks later and that was really hard. I think a lot of people were afraid to call, email, contact me in some way, but it would have been nice, you know. It's always nice to know that someone is thinking of you and can take a few minutes out their busy lives just to call and chat, even for 5 minutes.
